Currently sitting at O'Hare International Airport.  My flight takes off in just about two hours.  It's been a VERY full last month... but a good one! So many sweet times of connecting with friends and family.  It's crazy to think that in just about 9 days, I will be heading back home to Uganda.  It's been a whirlwind.  I landed into Fort Wayne... stayed there about 10 days and then hopped in a car and headed to the western suburbs of Chicago.  Following my time there, I hopped a plane and headed south to Florida and visited with my parents, grams, and their friends.  Was even able to sneak in a little road trip to northern Florida where I met up with a high school friend.  Then it was off to Portland, Oregon to see my siblings.  A few days before I left Florida, I received word that my little buddy, Frank was very sick with malaria.  For those of you who have been following me on the blog, this little guy was born in March. When he was born, he was barely breathing.  And together, his parents and I, along with others, watched God sustain him.  He recovered fully and up until right before Christmas was an energetic little guy.  Ate lunch with his parents and him two days before I left.  And I assumed quite safely that I would see him again.  I have to confess that even with the knowledge that he was really sick with malaria, I assumed I would see him again.  I assumed he would recover.   And yet, as I was heading to the airport, I knew in my spirit that little Frank was dying.  I can't explain it other than I just believe that God gave me a heads up.  When I arrived at my gate and opened my computer and was greeted by multiple messages telling me that Frank had just died,  the tears came so strongly.  I craved home in Uganda and I craved connecting with his parents... all who knew this precious life.  I found myself mourning in a way that I don't think I had ever done before.  I just couldn't believe that he was really gone.  From a treatable disease.  And yet, despite the tears, despite a sadness that panted the depth of my heart.... there was a peace.  I wish I had fancy words to explain it... to put it into words... but there aren't.  It was just there.  God was just there with me.   On Sunday, I was able to call and talk with his sweet momma Rebecca and his daddy Ronald.  There was a lot of silence and a lot of being.... and really, I just can't wait to go and be with them.  To bring them the outfit I bought their baby boy and to show them the pictures that I had ordered for them.  Frank will not be forgotten.  Nope... I was his sanga (his auntie) and he was my little buddy.  And I don't understand why God brought him home so soon.  I won't lie... in my humble opinion (or maybe not so humble opinion), he went home to soon.  But this is where the plastic hits the road... this is where, by only HIS grace, I rest in knowing that God is good.  He knows what He is doing... even when we don't.  And so I leave you with some pictures... first of baby Frank... and then of some of the many people I have seen in the last month.  Thanks for journeying!

sweet Frank and his mom just days old recovering in the hospital. 

A priceless family portrait.  

The little guy I held so many mornings during training.... 

A recent family shot.


Frank, you will be missed.  I won't say rest peacefully sweet child... because you are undoubtably running around heaven FREE and HEALTHY! Love you sweet boy!

A great morning with many of my siblings! (minus 3)

Mikey P--ps and me! 

Bling Bling sis in law, Keri, sweet sis sarah, and Mikey P--ps! 

Caroline and Kimmy posing like days long gone

OH Kathleen.. my true Drama sister.  Oh the memories we have had over the years! SO great to see you girl.... 11 hours of driving for mmmm... maybe 5 hours of actual hang out time! so worth it! 

Allie, a dear friend since junior high! Such a gift!!! And so great to hang out!!! love you girl!

Dear friends from HCA! Love you ladies and so thankful that after all these years, we are still friends!


And there have been so many more people that I have been able to connect with, process with, listen to, laugh with, and simply be.... such a gift! SUCH a gift!

And I am off to my gate.... hopefully, my flight will be on time.  Snow is EVERYWHERE here in Chicago.....

freezing weather and two sweet little girls....

It's crazy to think that just a week ago, I had just spent the day at a pool basking underneath the blazing hot summer.  The sun that day was surprisingly strong and I ended that day a little more red than anything.  And today I sit in a Starbuck's enjoying the warmth of the inside as I look out out to a light dusking of snow and temperatures that are anything but warm.  Heating blankets, hot drinks, and warm clothes are all sweet things.  It has been such a gift seeing loved ones... it has been a RICH 3 days and I am really excited to have another month visiting family and friends. Just wanted to give you a few updates on two little girls that I have been sharing with you all about.  Little Shakira is doing well.  Recovering from such a huge operation is HARD work... but report has it that she is doing well.   And that is really really exciting! Thank you to so many of you who have prayed, supported, and journeyed along.

Shakira

Momma Shakira and little Shakira

                                                 

And little Gina went home to be with Jesus the other morning.  For the most part, we stayed away from taking pictures of this sweet little girl.  A physical body that is not doing well can be so vulnerable and personal and we wanted to maintain the dignity of this precious little girl.  But this picture is perfect.... it captures the sweet personality of this precious little girl.  ( c :   Her story was a stretcher for me... but I am so thankful to know that at this very moment... she is FREE.  Free from the disease that took her and with Jesus.  Shortly before Gina breathed her last, her Dad accepted Christ.   She left this world surrounded by those who cared and loved her and there is hope that they will all be reunited again.  And that is awesome! 

This little girl is FREE and while there is sadness, there is hope.  Hope in the promises of our God.  He is faithful, He is true, and He is sovereign.  And this little girl is very much alive! 

Winter Update 2013

Holla! Holla! This year has been such a gift! This link will take you to my Newsletter.  If you would like to get on the mailing list for this, please let me know.  Celebrating the power of our God and the good things He has.... for each of us! Blessings to you all.  The next time I write... I'll be on the other side of the ocean! ( c : 

Smiles

In just a few hours, I will be hopping a plane and heading back towards my home in the States.  And that is exactly what it feels like.... leaving one home behind and heading to another.  This place has become home to me and I am so thankful to be returning in January.  In the meantime, I so look forward to just being with so many friends and family.  And with hours before I leave, I wanted to get an update to you all.  And it will probably be pretty short.  I'll pretty much let the picture speak for itself. Shakira went home yesterday.  And she is doing great! Thank you for journeying with her, for journeying along with me, and for being such a source of encouragement to me.  

I am hoping to get my newsletter up and posted before I leave in a few hours.  It's a little bit of a battle.  Apple Mac Pages and this blog don't seem to be the best of friends.... or probably a more likely scenario is that my lack of computer savy skills is making it hard to post the pages document to blogger.

a mixture of emotions

I am struggling with words today and while everything in me wants to share more... to bring to the surface the many different emotions that are still moving within my heart, I realize that they aren't quite ripe.  Yesterday was a day full of emotions.  A day of Thanksgiving and a day of Resting in the fact that God is good even when things are just hard.   I knew I was heading into Kampala to see sweet Shakira who was fresh out of surgery and still in the ICU.  I didn't know what other things God had planned for the day.  None of us do.  It's something I am being reminded of all the time.  I might have my plans... but way more often, He has other plans.  And so after picking up my Uganda Drivers license and doing a little shopping for my family group, my friend and I headed to Mulago Hospital.  

A place that I have become very familiar with in the last several months.  Tucked back down a hallway in the ICU we found.... 

a very sleepy little girl.  

and an excellent nurse who was
appropriately insistent that Shakira do some coughing.    

After coughing for the nurse, it was time to rest.  Her momma was right at her side.  

And while Shakira slept away, I decided to assess her heart myself.  ( c :  

And I was just visiting.  A. Deborah, coworker and friend, has been with this
family all week long! Thank you Auntie Deborah! Your presence has been a gift!
Shakirah's little sister hanging at the hospital.

And with a Thanksgiving dinner to get back to it, we said our goodbyes quicker than we wanted to and hopped back in the van.  We had one more official stop before heading back home.  About a month ago, I shared with you on the blog about a young girl named Gina. She had arrived at the clinic very ill with sickle cell complications and a low blood count.  And indeed when we saw her, we knew she was very, very ill. We sat with young Gina and her momma and spent time talking and praying.  Young Gina gave her heart to Jesus and her life was forever changed.  Since meeting her at our clinic, little Gina has been in the hospital.  First, at the hospital here in Kiwoko and then she we brought her to Mulago.  Since then, her condition has only deteriorated and it is clear that her time on this earth is limited.  In addition to the sickle cell, her body is fighting suspected metastatic cancer.  The doctor lifted up a chest x-ray and a tumor was clearly seen.  Leaning close to Gina's face, I greeted her. Her eyes struggled to focus and as they tried, I asked her how she was.  She told me she was fine.  Her small body working hard to breath. I held her head and I prayed over her.  I could feel my own heart muscles feeling the pang of stretches far beyond comfort.  I was looking at the precious face of a girl just six years old with her baby teeth still in place barely able to speak.  I told her in my not so smooth Uganda that God was with her and she lifted her eyebrows indicating an agreeance with my statement.  And He is.  He is JUST as actively present with her as He is with little Shakira waking up from a life-saving open heart surgery.  And so with emotions still trying to find words, I rest in knowing that my God is good.  And so the plan is for little Ruth to be taken from Mulago on Sunday and to be brought back to her home in Kiwoko.  There she will be made comfortable and to be surrounded by those who have come to love her.  And I rest because she is not alone.  Her Daddy is with her preparing to bring her Home.  

 

less than 12 hours.....

And tonights blog post will be probably one of the shortest ones yet.  In less than 12 hours, little Shakira will be in surgery.  

And instead of asking people what's bothering them 

and taking careful documentation.....

And having absolutely no idea of how to help.... 

except to do what comes naturally.... smile...

Little Shakira will be the one receiving care.... she will be having surgery on her heart....   A surgery that will allow her heart to grow and function well.  And while she definitely isn't short of energy now... my prayer is that this surgery will allow her to have energy for years to come.

And they are off.... 

And so is Shakira.... 

And it's very possible that one day soon... Shakira will be the one pulling an unsuspecting child in a "jerry can" mobile.  

Jesus, I thank you for Shakira... and the gift that she is to so many.  Her smiles, her hugs, and her zeal for life.  As she sleeps tonight, I ask that you would fill her with peace and a keen awareness of your presence.  I ask the same for her momma as well.  And as her surgeon also sleeps... I ask that you would refresh his body and mind.  That as he works on Shakira's heart... that you would work through Him.  I rest in knowing that you have Shakira... you have her today... tomorrow... and all the days that you have planned for her.  Thank you for the gift that she is.  Thank you that you are in control and that you have your baby girl....close to your heart.  You have good for your little girl and I stand in anticipation of watching your plan for her unfold. 

And so little Shakira.... God-willing I'll see you on Thursday.... for now may your spirit know that so many are lifting you and your momma  up in prayer..... 

A Closed Hole, a Closed Door and a Healer that heals ALL.

The sun has just set over Kampala and many bugs are greeting the night with great enthusiasm.  Various other sounds are heard as I sit here.  I can hear the faint barking of a dog, people talking in the distance, and the movement of various vehicles.  And as I sit here, I ponder the gift of today.  The gift of being able to be present with Adong Betty and her momma as they received some really good news.  It has been one month since Adong Betty was admitted into the hospital for closure of a huge hole in her heart.  Her momma reports that there has been improvement in Adong's health.  The echo this morning confirmed this.  Prior to her discharge last month from the hospital, Adong had an echo of her heart.  Basically, the doctor used a special ultrasound and was able to see her heart in detail.  And the echo showed that there was significant closure of the hole... but there was still a residual hole present.  Her heart function, the strength of her heart, was also weakened by the procedure.  Still, even with this information, her surgery was considered successful and she was scheduled to come back today for a follow-up.   Today, the echo showed COMPLETE CLOSURE of the hole.  Her heart is still weakened, but the doctor did not seem at all bothered.  She went home with an added medication that will help in strengthening her heart muscles and the plan is for her to return in six months for a review.  Adong had lots of smiles today.  She was noticeably more comfortable with the various things asked of her by the doctors and nurses.  She has grown.  Her trust has grown.  Her smiles have grown.  And my prayer for this young girl is that her other heart.... that her nonphysical heart will also be strengthened in the coming months.  That she would know the love of Jesus who has journeyed with her from the very beginning.          

A careful listen of her heart by a doctor. 

All smiles from Adong! 

Thank You for loving this family with your prayers and generosity!  

And off they go! (Adong is behind the driver and in front of her momma hidden underneath the wrap her momma is holding).  Looking forward to seeing her in six months and keeping you all posted!

Thank you to each and everyone of you who have journeyed along with Adong and her family. 

           

Little Fatiyah was scheduled to have open heart surgery on Wednesday.  Several of us drove in early Wednesday morning to be present as this little girl underwent major open heart surgery.   We arrived at the hospital shortly after 8 AM.  Surgery was scheduled to happen any minute.  We circled around Fatiyah and her momma and prayed over this little girl.  A short while later, the surgeon came over.  When asked if he was ready for surgery, he said no.  Last minute discussions amongst the team that would be working on Fatiyah left them hesitant to proceed.  To be honest, it was a hard moment.  Saddened for a momma who was anticipating her daughter having a needed heart surgery that would not only help her heart, but also bring her one step closer to having very necessary surgery on her skull.  Heaviness at realizing that for this little girl, surgery is not an immediate option.  And mixed in with the sadness for momma and Fatiyah,  I found myself struggling.  All the prep work had been completed.  Fatiyah had met with specialists and gone for pre-op reviews  and green lights had been given.  And the decision to not proceed on the morning of surgery was hard.  And it's important for me to acknowledge it.   Because it was there.  The worry of people's questions to a last minute cancellation shadowed my heart.  It was almost like my own heart was under the probe of an echo machine.  And a "people pleaser/taking on too much responsibility"defect was illuminated.  And I don't want it.  And so I am going to the greatest Heart Surgeon I know and I am trusting that He will redeem and heal this area of my heart.  Because I want my heart to be as healthy as it can be.  Not for man, not for things, but for Him. 

And I love the fact that God can be working in Fatiyah's heart, her momma's heart, Adong's heart, my heart, your heart all simultaneously.   And His healing is not limited by the physical.  It goes much deeper than that.  And I rest in that tonight... for myself, for Fatiyah and her mom... and for the countless other children and adults waiting life-saving operations both physically and spiritually.

Ezekiel 36:26

"And I will give you a new heart, and a new spirit I will put within you.  And I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh."