a simple blog... with a twist of seriousness...

I don't know what it is....but my fingers are itching to write.  And so, because you all are along for the journey.... you get to come along with me. Yesterday was  an absolutely productive and lazy day all crammed into one.  I think a more accurate assessment of the day would be that it was very productive... but being able to do different things at a leisurely pace makes it much more enjoyable.  This past Saturday, I was able to FaceTime in to watch my grams memorial service.  My sister set up her iPad which was put in a chair.  So, in many ways, I took a seat and was present with family and friends who came together to celebrate the life of my sweet grams.  I was so thankful that the internet worked so well.  There wasn't one interruption the entire ceremony.  Amen.  Something to be celebrated for sure! The few minutes before the ceremony were spent goofing around with my siblings.  It was so great to see cousins, siblings, my parents, aunt and uncle, and so many others! 

Looking at the program... through the computer screen

Grams and I... just a few years back! 

Chilling with Jonny and Caroline..... 

And days go by.  Much time is spent in the clinic.  Taking care of the sweet little children who come in including the sweet jaja's (grandma's).  Lots of sweet opportunities to love on, treat, send back to class, and care for.  Lots of coughs, colds, and fevers.  An equal amount of small scratches, upset stomaches with smiling faces, and other similar needs.  Wisdom from above and care no matter the seriousness of the illness.  Lots of opportunities to be faced with things that are completely out of my league... and to lean into my God.  He's got this.  He's got His children.  And He's got me.  Just today, I found myself beating myself up over something.  Questioning my decision and fearing the outcome of my decision.  And the self-doubts came.... the worries... the lies... and the "oh my... am I cut out for this?".... and then it's an opportunity to confess the pride, stand in the truth, and make the choice to rest in HIS goodness.  He has led.  He has brought me here. and I choose to rest in that.  To be brutally honest, it's a bit hard to do.  BUT crucial to do. And something I have the choice to do.  And so I choose to stand in HIM.   If there is something I have seen God do in the past year.... is do the impossible.  The absolute impossible.  Today, sitting beside Ketty as we celebrated her 39th year of life, I was overcome with emotion.  The emotion of significant goodbyes this past month along with  the gift of sitting by a friend who is celebrating another year of physical life.   A friend who has seen her God in sweet and amazing ways and is eager to share HIS goodness with so many others.  And so I choose life .... life in the little details of my heart.... and I rest in the gift that He has given me.... to be His hands and feet to the amazing individuals who come to the clinic each and every day... to each child within my family group.... to my friends who have become like family to me.  My little brief blog post sorta got serious.  But, I am ok with that.  I hope you all are too.  ( c :  

And speaking of life.... check out just some of the sweet, little ones that I get to interact with at the clinic.  Absolutely priceless.  Absolutely Adorable.  Absolutely an honor to walk with em.  

Sweet Izzy... washing hands is A-OK!

Miriab washing her hands.... 

Talking with JaJa Congo

The foot soak.... 

Charting away..... 

the needs of the clinic... pill bottles, coca cola and a pinard

And as I bring this sorta random blog-post to a close.... I share a few Christmas pictures with you all. The other week, I was walking by the Special Needs Building and ran into.... none other than Santa Clause.... who had even put on gumboots.  A necessity during the rainy season.... fo sure!  

I know it's not Christmas.... but all I got to say as I close this blog post is.... Merry Almost Christmas! and the second is....

Deuteronomy 30:19

¹⁹ I call heaven and earth to witness against you today, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and curse. Therefore choose life, that you and your offspring may live,

Gracias Katonda!

This isn't going to be a long post.  It might actually just be a few sentences.  Last week at New Hope, a team from Mexico came to serve.   And with them, they brought a huge suitcase of medical supplies and medications.  As a nurse working in a clinic.... these donations are always amazing.  It is always a blessing.  Almost always, we are blessed with more band-aids, gloves, and triple antibiotic creams.  Things that we use on a daily basis.  Things that we never really stop needing.  And almost just as often as we are blessed with things that we use consistently, we are also blessed with things that only God knew we needed.  For example, earlier this year, we were short on hemorrhoid cream.  Not something I had added to our needs list.  And tucked into one of the boxes brought by a team was a good supply of hemorrhoid cream.  I was tickled.  When I said something to the leader, he made a comment alluding to the idea that it was more of a mistake that it came than anything.  I smiled.  God knew it was needed way before it became a need.

And this week was no different.  Except that this time, God brought something specific for me.   I have a rare deficiency requiring daily medication.  It's rare enough that at the hospital I worked at in Fort Wayne, I was told by the pharmacy that filled my prescription that I was the only patient on that medication.  It's a big deal and not a big deal all wrapped up into one.  The key is taking the supplement.  And that's how it is.  I tell you about this because it is the prelude to just how amazing God is and just how into the details He truly is.

So, a team from Mexico comes to Uganda. Tucked in their suitcase of medications and supplies are an ample supply of the VERY medication that I take.  Going through the medications was an adventure in itself.  The medications were all in Spanish.... being looked at by Ugandans whose primary language was Luganda and by yours truly.  Yours truly who thinks more in Luganda now than in Spanish.  I can barely remember basic words.  What comes out is Luganda.  Some would argue that what comes out is "special" Luganda.  But either way, more Luganda than Spanish.

And so as we looked through the treasures.... I was stumped when I saw the medications that I take.  Stumped.  Silenced Really.  I had come with the tablet form of the medication I take... but God had brought the liquid form.  God had sent a medication that He knew I needed with a team from Mexico to Uganda.  How crazy.  How crazy amazing.

The details.  The care.  The reminder in a simple way of "I got you".   He's got me on something I didn't know I needed.  But He did.  And it just tickles my heart.

Matthew 6:26

Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap no gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them.  Are you not more valuable than they?

And yep, that blog post was a few sentences longer than a few.  ( c :  

Webale Nyo Katonda.  (Thank you very much God).  Gracias Dios (Thank you God)  Thank you very much God.  

a Holy shirt, A Cancer Free Declaration, Some Wet Cement, and a Solid Rock....

I probably should have a lot of deep thoughts to write about.  Instead I start out this blog post with seemingly mundane.  About two weeks back, I did some laundry and placed my wet clothes out on the line.  Before I knew it, several days had passed.  And by several,  I mean nearly a week.  The clothes were flapping in the wind..... all except for my new white shirt that had somehow come off the line and was laying in a ball on the ground.  It was wet and dirty.  What I didn't realize right away was that the fact that my new white shirt was wet and dirty was the least of my problems.  The shirt wasn't really a shirt anymore.... the termites had found it and had consumed well over half of it.  It was no longer wearable.... by any standards.  And all I could do was smile.  Glad that the termites enjoyed my new shirt.  Just a few days back, I was hanging some more laundry up on the line when I saw the top of the termite hill. It had just sprung up.  And it seemed that someone had kicked it.  Thankful for that. Those little termites were creative or smart in where they set up their house.  Hopefully, I will outsmart em.  For all the animal lovers out there, I am sorry... but I am planing on having someone put a little poison down their hole.  Hoping this works and no more clothes are lost to the hungry little termites!  ( c :  

It's been a hard few weeks.  Hard and hopeful all smashed together.  To be honest, it's been more leaning towards hard.  And today as I thought about writing a blog post, I found myself wanting to share some of my favorites from the last couple of months.  

Making pizza with my girls.  Looking forward to being with them again more intently during the first few days of their upcoming break.  Both Phionah and Lindah are neat young ladies and I have the honor of walking alongside them.  

These two pictures  may be two of my favorite pictures of the year.  A. Ketty and I with the giraffe.  A. Ketty was all nervous nilly around them (can't say I was all calm, cool, and collected myself) and we did a LOT of laughing that day.  On Friday evening, I received a phone call that shook me to the core.  A. Ketty had had a CT scan and the findings were absolutely unexpected.... on multiple levels.  There was/is no evidence of cancer on her scans!!!!  I can't believe how amazing this is.  The type of cancer that Ketty had was both aggressive and came with a 80-90% mortality rate.  To flip the coin, the survival rate for this cancer is 10-20%.  Just about 6 months after treatment was started, the cancer is no longer detectable on the scans.  For me personally, this came as a huge encouragement.  God is powerful.  He can do whatever He wants, however He wants, and Where-ever He wants. His timing was no mistake. It has only been a little over 48 hours since we had buried Wizeye.  Due to all the rain, I don't even think the cement had fully dried.  And a strong reminder that nothing is a mistake from God.  God is not defined by location, situation, or anything else.  His plans prevail.  For A. Ketty it was physical healing coupled with deeper relationship with her God.  For Wizeye, the ultimate healing.  His going home and being with His Daddy.   I mourn his absence from this earth... the gift of interacting with him regularly.... but also smile at the thought that He is in heaven.  

Surrounded by those who loved him.  

Just a handful of days before he left this earth.  

 And while we were saying goodbye and see you later to Wizeye over here on this side of the ocean, my sweet grams was also finishing up her time here on earth.  Monday afternoon, my gram breathed her last and entered into eternity.  My grams was spicy and fun.  We had lots of laughs over the years along with deep conversations.  I am thankful that she was my grams.  Love you grams.  I'll see you soon! 

This picture is a few years old.... ( c :  

On Sunday, I left New Hope and headed to the capital.  The plan was for a few days of rest.  And what started as a few days has turned into multiple days.  My heart was really feeling the pull of the last couple of weeks.  I came tired and hurting.  And in the quietness of the last several days, I have found not only rest.... but sweet and much needed time with my God.  This afternoon, I was led to a passage in Isaiah.  And it was food for my soul.  

Isaiah 26:3-4

"You keep him in perfect peace who mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you.  Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord God is an everlasting Rock.  

Thank you to all of you who have prayed, encouraged, and journeyed with me this last month.  Communicating via email and Facebook has been a struggle due in part to poor internet and limited time. Thank you for your patience and I hope to get caught up on emails and Facebook messages in the next couple of days.

Thankful to each of you and your presence on this journey.

Kimberly/Kimmy/Kim

An end of one chapter and the beginning of many, many more.

There aren't a ton of words right now.  The last couple of days have been somehow a blur.  A mixture of immensely rich moments coupled with the intensity of strong emotion.  This morning, I opted out of driving to the other side of New Hope and instead chose to walk.  I was teary in the beginning of the walk, but as I walked the pangs of emotions only intensified.  It was a walk where the tears did the mourning.  I didn't have a bunch of words.  Just the emotions.  The pain.  It was only yesterday that I held Wizeye's hand and told him that it was ok to go home.  I assured him that God would take care of his family.  Wizeye told me that he was going.  And a little over an hour later, he did.  One minute he was there... the next he was gone.  Gone, but not forgotten.  Gone.  I talked with him one moment as I stretched out his arms.  I stepped away from his bedside to grab a quick bite.  And in those few minutes, he took his last breath.  Gone.  But not totally GONE.  What remains are the memory of a young man full of grace.  I've come to know him well over the last year plus.  We have had hard talks and easy ones.  We have laughed and we have cried.  My first memory of him is the time he was brought to the clinic late at night.  He had a huge cut on his head that needing suturing.  The clippers used to shave his head jammed and he was left with a haircut that was absolutely ridiculous.  He could have been angry.... could have been frustrated.... but instead, he was so gracious.  Who would have known that that interaction was the beginning of many.  Countless days, he came in for blood pressure and medication monitoring.  There were doctor visits, urgent trips to the hospital, and multiple opportunities to chat.  Over the last couple of months, his physical condition has deteriorated.  It has stretched me... challenged me... and stretched me some more.  Hard questions to be asked and even harder ones to decide.  None have been answered alone.  God has led. And the peace of God has followed.  Wizeye left this world yesterday peaceful.  He left it ready.   And truth be told, it has been a day full of tears and many emotions.  But tucked underneath it, is a hope that has foundationally secured the day.... the last couple of weeks..  Wizeye you will be missed.  But we will see you again. For me, I say Sula Bulungi.  But for you, my friend, I say Good Day.  Thank you for walking in faith and for finishing the race so well.

And as Wizeye settles into Heaven.... my grams, thousands of miles away, is also preparing to go home to heaven.   Thankful for each of them and the impact that both of them have had on my life.

Great is THY Faithfulness!

Friends visiting at Kiwoko Hospital. 

I've been wanting to write this blog for several days now... but the internet has been struggling.   It's a little after 10 PM and I am in the clinic.  Wizeye, our young man with serious kidney issues, has been in Kampala seeing a doctor.  I am not sure what is taking them so long to get back, but am trusting that at any moment, he will arrive at the clinic with his mom.  Wizeye's health has taken a turn in the last several weeks.  A hard turn.  His kidney function has continued to deteriorate.  He was admitted to Kiwoko hospital early this week in fluid overload.  Today, we prepared a room for him at the clinic.  It's cozy and ready for him and his mom.  It is also ready for the many friends that will undoubtably find their way to him.  Some wanting to chat.  Others wanting to be.  All, undoubtably, wanting to connect.  This past Tuesday, I sat with Wizeye at the hospital and we talked.  We talked about living.  We talked about dying.  And lots in between.  It was a hard conversation.  As I told Wizeye the other day, we don't know how his story will end.  We don't.  But what we do know is that Wizeye is not alone.  Not in the physical form and definitely not in the unseen.  His God is with him just as there are many, many others who are walking this journey with him.  Some physically.  Some in prayer.  Each different, but each so important.  I ask you to pray for Wizeye in these coming days.  For his heart.  For his kidneys.  For a deeper trust in His God. 




   

And my goodness, there is so much to report from this past week.  I received a message on Saturday morning letting me know that U. Ronald had been trying to get a hold of me.  Rebecca had a sweet baby girl! oh MY! I just KNEW it was going to be a girl and had joked on and off that they would name her Chimberly. Just in case you are wondering.... I was naming her after myself.  How selfish eh?  K's here are often pronounced with a "Ch" sound.  Hence, the Chimberly.  Well, her name is NOT Chimberly... but rather Alice Isabel Kwagala.  What a joy to sit with this couple and to hold their sweet baby girl.  I am sure that her Big Brother Frank is surely looking down from heaven smiling at his baby sister.  God is good! 

Mom, Dad, aunties, and sweet baby Alice.  

Alice Isabel Kwagala

On Sunday, A. Ketty came to church.  This is her first time at church since, I believe, March.  She is doing well and just a few hours ago, finished another round of chemo.  So great  She has strength, she has smiled, and she has spice!   (c : She is already a walking miracle.  The type of cancer that she has is VERY aggressive and the fact that she is up walking, eating, and laughing is testimony to the power of her God.  






Just over a month ago, I received an email from my tenant.  He had just gotten a new job and need to move ASAP.  He was moved out within 4 days.  I think even less.  The house had a lot of work that needed to be done.  A lot.  I put the humble request out to my friends in the area and before I knew it.... friends were stepping up and working on my house.  People I didn't even know also joined the project.  My tenant had offered to pay the rent for September.  And by the end of September, I had new tenants.  What a blessing! So many to be exact.  Those who cleaned. scrubbed.  painted.  gave.  repaired.  organized.  E.A.C.H. A. G.I.F.T!  


And so it's now well after 11:30 PM.  Wizeye just arrived a short while with his mom.  It's been a long day fort them.  And it be most wise for me to bring this to an end.  The morning comes quickly.  My heart is doing pretty well.  A week full of varying emotions.  Processing through on next steps for a young man and greeting a little baby girl just starting her journey of life.  Tucked into these were connecting with the family group.... listening to a few share from their hearts..... eating chocolate and drinking tea... diving into Luganda Lessons.... and practicing those words with the patients who came into the clinic.  There were lungs to listen to and rashes to examine.  And so, it's another week of life here.... a life I am so thankful for.  And so dear friends... near and far.  These fingers will hopefully find sleep shortly.  For each set of eyes that find their way to this blog page.  Thank you.  Thank you for journeying along with me....It is a GIFT!

a lunch-date overlooking the lake.

It's well after 10 and for this young chic... it is way past my bedtime.  In my earlier days, the clock would often tick midnight before I found my pillow.  But as the years have gone by, my internal clock has demanded more sleep.  And I don't hesitate to comply.  Sleep comes quickly and before I know it, the roosters are greeting the day.  My eyes often open before seven somehow ready for the day.  Right now, my mind is refusing to let me sleep.  And so here I am bringing fingers to keyboard.  I've just nearly finished my vacation, my leave.  It has been a delightful 2 1/2 weeks of refreshment, relaxing, exploring, processing, and being.  It has been absolute food for the soul.  Good times with good peeps.  Tomorrow, I head back to New Hope.  I head back to a life I have come to love so much.  Today, as I sat at a restaurant overlooking one of Africa's largest lakes, I found my heart absorbing my surroundings.  I sat next to a couple having a last meal with one of their mothers.  They left so she could catch her flight.  As the wind blew on my face, I found my heart stirring.  It's been stirring for a while.  Today was the day for the stirring to find its voice.  I had brought my computer with me.  Nestled within my bag, I had hopped a boda boda and made the journey from the guesthouse to the restaurant.  Pulling it out, I found the words just pouring out.  So often, when I write, I write with the intention of updating my blog or writing with some other intention. Today, I wrote to an audience of One.  To my God.  And boy, did my heart cry out.  God has been challenging me to share my heart with Him.. it's been a theme for much of this year.  To be honest, I often pause, often struggle to do so with certain areas.  I have no problem acknowledging something to Him as hard... even opening up to a certain depth.  But with certain areas of my heart, I struggle to go much deeper.  And He has been so patient with me.  Nudging my heart.  Waiting patiently.  Yet, not absently.  And so today, the words flowed.  And my heart poured out.  And though I was sitting at a restaurant with a bunch of people, I seriously felt like I was sitting side by side with my God.  And in reality, I was.  And it was healing.  These last 2 1/2 weeks have been healing....have been rejuvenating...have been food for the soul.  Not because my life is in a bad place (anything could be further from the truth), but as is the case anywhere... life can grab you by the earlobes and propel you into a life full of busyness.  That busyness can become your worst enemy.  That busyness can stifle you, rob you, and distract you.  And today, with the wind blowing on my face and the sound of water in the distance, my heart tucked under the shadow of the last two weeks, opened up.  And my God and I sat.  And He listened as I poured out my heart.


Psalm 62:8
"Trust in him at all times, O people;
pour out your heart before Him;
God is a refuge for us."

And that's that.  Thankful for His patience and His pursuance and His unwillingness to let me be stubborn with certain areas of my heart.  He wants it all.  And tonight, I give thanks for His pursuance with my whole heart.

Psalm 86:12-13
"I give thanks to you, O Lord my God, with my whole heart, and I will glorify your name forever.  For great is your steadfast love toward me; you have delivered my soul from the depths of Sheol."

So thankful for my lunch date with my God today.

A bit of Variety.

Last night, I found my way to a blog.  A blog that I have frequented for well over five years.  A message on twitter let me know that there was a survey to fill out.  It was seven questions long and the big request from the author was that those who chose to participate would be completely honest.  She wanted this so much in fact, that the comments would not be posted.  This sounded simple enough.  I like these kind of things.  And so I read through the questions and began answering them. My soul and fingers seemed congruent.  The words flowed.  And before I knew it, I was finished.  Finished as far as the blog was concerned.  Not finished on what had been stirred within my heart.  Honesty had been requested and what had spilled from my heart was not only honesty, but rawness and vulnerability.  Now, even 12 plus hours later, I am still processing.  This morning, I sat in a coffee shop and dialogued with my God.  The rawness continues.  The peace ensues.  

It does.  The peace has graciously ensued.  And maybe the word "ensued" is not the best word... because to be brutally honest, the peace has not only "ensued"... it has been present throughout these last months.  Supernaturally so, if you ask me.  

Present as I have looked at the lab work of our young man with serious kidney disease.  His kidney function has deteriorated seriously in the last month.  Before, we planned on how to maintain his kidney function and his life.  Now, the conversation focuses on next steps and facing the reality that his life on earth may be much shorter than it is longer.   Hard Conversations.  Hard Reality. If I were to hashtag this, it would say something like #hardhardhardallicandoistrust  but most times, life is more than a hashtag. (profound statement. ( c :  ) Watching a young man face death far sooner than I would like is very hard.  It puts any faith to the test.  It has surely challenged my own.   And it requires a decision to trust.  Trust in HIS goodness and His bigger plan.  Yes, for sure it is #hardhardhardallicandoistrust but it is also painful and sad, and everything in between.  Those feelings, those emotions are very much present.  His peace is also very much present.  I don't understand the peace, but I surely embrace it.  And I am thankful that it has been foundation ally present.  

And just as the peace has been present in supernatural ways.  Joy has also been present.  Joy in playing a game of monopoly with the kids in my family group.  I learned the word to pay and together, we laughed and laughed.  They were determined to buy everything they could and giggled with glee when it was time for a friend to "pay up".  Going to jail was a bummer... but was also met with laughter.  One boy stole the whole pile of $500 bills.  And tried to convince me he didn't take them.  Mmmm.  If he had swiped a few, I would have surely missed it.  Swipe the whole pile and well, it's hard NOT to miss.  I guess I am sorta thankful that he has not mastered the art of stealing.  Yep, I am very glad he hasn't.   Sasula! (PAY!)  Oh, if I had only had this word mastered months ago when I accidentally asked the waitress if she wanted us to vomit then or later... if only.... 

Yes, there has been peace and joy these last months.  And there has been tears, laughter, and other emotions.  Yep, a variety.  But life is a variety... isn't it?  Everywhere I look, there is variety.  There isn't just one type of ant or spider or rodent... but a multitude of different kinds.  I've come to know the varying variety found here in Uganda.  And though it's neat that there are a variety, I have to admit that I would rather focus on variety in other things.  

And this post is surely becoming the variety.  Ha! This past week Lyle and Ingrid came back to New Hope for a visit.  This couple is currently serving in the northern part of Uganda.  We were in the same training that started in January of 2013.  This past week, we met up with fellow students from that class.  We cooked traditional Ugandan food.  There was a chicken to kill.  Matooke to smash.  And things to share.  We had our fair share of laughter.  We also had our fair share of sharing the variety of things that had happened in our lives over the last year plus.  We cried together as we remembered baby Frank and mourned the death of U. Michael and A. Sarah's sweet baby boy.  We listened.  We prayed.  And at the end of the night, we all hugged.  A night was ending and a new day was preparing to start.  

The chicken on the way home...

The same chicken a short while
later! A lot happened between these
shots... 

Preparing the food.... 

And we enjoyed the food too much.... didn't get any pictures in the moment! Oops! 

A. Sarah and I.  Co-workers.  Friends.  Fellow sisters.  

Rebecca.  A dear friend.  And about ready
to have her baby.  I predict a baby girl.  I predict
her name will be Kimberly.  haa haa! 

Kids, Kids, Kids.... just chilling out! 

And before I bring this post to an end.  I'll leave with you a variety of highlights and mid lights of the last month.

-Last week, my grams fell and broke her hip.  I've been able to talk with her a few times.  This last time, I welcomed her back from the land of morphine.  She sounded good on the phone.   I don't know what God has planned. I just know that my grams is my grams and I love her! Praying for peace for her soul and healing for that hip.
-I'm currently on leave.  God has worked it out for me to be able to spend much of this time with different friends.  I've been on leave officially for 1 day and thus far it has been absolutely delightful.  Absolutely restful.  And I've been Absolutely thankful.
-The vehicle that i was able to purchase thanks to so many of you who gave sacrificially will be coming soon.  And when I get behind that wheel, I will surely take a picture.  So thankful for this HUGE blessing.  And it is just that.  A HUGE blessing.  Thank you!
-Ketty has finished her second round of chemotherapy! She is doing well.  Yes, she is feeling the effects of chemo... but she is doing well.  And that is pretty amazing!
-Watched from thousands of miles away as many of my dear friends and family attacked my rental property.  The previous tenant moved out and let's just say there was a LOT of work to do.  A LOT.  God brought up an army and the house is already being shown... less than 3 weeks after I got the email from my tenant.  Amazing.  Thank you!

And I think I could keep talking... but I fear I may lose many of you.  I'll keep a variety to a minimal and will try and write some more later.

Love to you all.  Thankful for each of you.  He is good.  May we each know HIS peace no matter what we are facing.  May we rest in His goodness no matter what.

He is life and I rest in that today.

In Him,

Kimberly